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February 5th, 2010
05:09 am - Perfume: The Story of a Murderer, Patrick Süskind
[Translated from the German by John E. Woods]
Jean-Baptiste Grenouille is born in the middle of a stinky mess with a very powerful nose and no odor of his own. His whole life is spent in the pursuit of odors, and when he smells a particularly wonderful-smelling woman, he kills her to possess her scent.
This obsession leads him to learn how to make perfume out of people.
Perfume is a strange and captivating novel.
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05:04 am - 99 More Unuseless Japanese Inventions, Kenji Kawakami
This book is full of examples of chindogu, which seems to be the art of making inventions that work but are pointless and kind of silly.
I don't know, I'd use that umbrella hat. Also, the solar flashlight is a silly idea, but there's one on the first page of this month's American Science & Surplus catalog.
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04:59 am - Were You Raised by Wolves? Clues to the Mysteries of Adulthood, Christie Mellor
Okay, there is way too much stuff about martinis in this book, and the financial advice has proved to be less than sound (real estate and the stock market, Mellor says, always go up). Still, there is a lot of good advice and information on haw to be a grown-up in this book.
I need this sort of thing.
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January 28th, 2010
01:54 am - Articles of Faith, Russell Brand
This is a collection of newspaper columns by Russell Brand. All of the columns are about soccer--sorry, I mean football.
The subject makes the book incredibly frustrating for me, because I am horrible at sports and give less than half a shit about them--always have.
As someone who knows nothing about "the footy," I found this book mystifying. Sometimes Brand is being his normal brilliantly funny self--and sometimes he might be, but I have no fucking idea what he is talking about.
Also, the book is rather obviously padded. Each column title has a whole page to itself, there are a few interviews thrown in that are just Brand talking with various people about football (gah!), and the book is randomly peppered with glamour shots of Brand.
I'll be the first to admit the man is pretty, but what the fuck do the photos have to do with soccer?
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01:47 am - Dreamsongs Volume 1, George R.R. Martin
A large collection of the author's short stories, starting with horrible thing he wrote for comic book fanzines.
Some of the stories are quite good, though I had to skip the fantasy ones because of the fantasy "tone" he adopted. That style annoys the hall out of me.
I'd read some of the horror stories before, and most were quite good.
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January 18th, 2010
09:33 pm - Night Visions 5
This anthology has three stories by Stephen King, three by Dan Simmons, and one by George R.R. Martin. The Simmons ones are pretty good. The Martin isn't bad. The King story I hadn't already read has a problem or two. You see, the title and the first paragraph make it seem like there should be way more to the story. Change the title and skip the first paragraph, and the story works. But as it is, I felt like I was missing something.
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09:26 pm - The Gun Seller, Hugh Laurie
When Thomas Lang refuses a contract to kill someone and goes to warn the man, he winds up fighting for his life. And after that's over, he winds up entangled in some of the most confusing, infuriating, reprehensible machinations Hugh Laurie can think up.
There's a lot of humor in this book, but I sure as hell wouldn't call it "lighthearted" like it says on the jacket.
Pretty good read.
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09:21 pm - Star Jumper, Frank Asch
Alex hates his little brother so much that he builds a spaceship out of cardboard so he can escape to another world. Unfortunately he realizes his preparation isn't adequate.
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09:19 pm - In the Small, Michael Hague
There is a blue flash, and every human on earth shrinks to less than six inches tall. A lot of them are eaten by cats or other animals. The ones who survive converge on one place..
I thought Hague was a good illustrator, but he seems to be really struggling with the faces in this graphic novel. The writing is kind of stilted, and the story is a "to be continued."
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09:06 pm - Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank, Celia Rivenbark
I loved the title of this collection of essays. So finally curiosity got the better of me.
A lot of the essays are quite good, and some of them are really funny. Of course, I couldn't identify with all of them, not being southern, married, or a mother--and being someone whose knowledge of trash TV is limited to "The Soup."
This book made me want to talk with a southern accent. It is an urge I get periodically, which is weird, since I've only lived in New York, Michigan and Pennsylvania, which should make me about as eastern as you can get. I think it has something to do with my name. My stepmother's name is Rona, and I can't imagine her with a drawl.
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08:59 pm - Laugh Off, Bob Fenster
The subtitle of this book is The Comedy Showdown Between Real Life and the Pros. It is full of quotes, jokes, and funny stories. A lot of this is quite good.
The problem lies with the guy who compiled the book, credited as an author. He has a section at the end of each chapter, and a few chapters at the end of each book. And they are terrible. They go beyond unfunny to unreadable. I realize comedy is subjective, but goddamn.
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08:54 pm - The Clumsiest People in Europe, Favell Lee Mortimer & Todd Pruzan
The guy who put this book together found an old, absolutely horrifying kids' geography book from the 1800s and became obsessed with the author.
Most of this book is excerpts from the geography books Mrs. Mortimer wrote. She hadn't actually traveled very much, so her information came from other books. And she hates everyone for some reason or another.
Reading this book is a surreal experience. You should try it.
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08:50 pm - A Steroid Hit the Earth
This is a collection of typos, misprints, corrections, and so forth. There's some really funny stuff in this book.
Excerpt:
To prevent your eyes watering when slicing onions dip them into boiling water for a few seconds.
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December 23rd, 2009
06:33 am - "What's That Smell?" (Oh, It's Me.), Tucker Shaw
This book is full of advice for teenager on getting through embarrassing situations. Most of the advice is quite solid. However, due to the subject matter, I would feel uncomfortable giving it to any teenagers I know. Sorry kids, you're on your own.
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06:30 am - Ghosts and More Ghosts, Robert Arthur
Collection of short stories, some of which have creepy premises, all of which seem somewhat familiar. Will definitely give a kid some good shudders.
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06:27 am - Binky the Space Cat, Ashley Spires
Binky has spent his life protecting his humans from aliens. When he becomes a certified Space Cat, Binky's only worry as he builds his rocket is who will protect his humans.
Adorable graphic novel is great for kids or anybody else who really loves a cat.
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December 21st, 2009
01:09 am - Mothstorm, Philip Reeve
Philip Reeve is making me crazy. There is a pattern to his series: First book is brilliant (Mortal Engines, Larklight), next book makes me wish he'd stop writing sequels, but I get through it (Predator's Gold, Starcross), the next book is not as good as the first, but light-years better than the second (Infernal Devices, this one), then the next book I can't get through (A Darkling Plain--shit, I even hate the title).
This gets on my nerves.
Anyway, this is a fun victorian space adventure, with neat critters in the illustrations. I just hope it's the last, so I don't go through the unreadable one.
I think the worst thing is that the first book is so good, I'm really gleeful when I find out there's a sequel..
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December 16th, 2009
11:18 pm - The Homing, Jeffrey Campbell
George Kenner's daughter Katherine moved to a small town and changed entirely. When George finally gets the courage to go and visit his kid, he's dismayed by Katherine's domesticity and seeming content.
George has ideas about some weird government-sponsored ESP project, but the truth turns out to be way creepier.
This was pretty good. Sometimes it pays to pick up obscure horror novels the library discards. Usually it doesn't.
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December 13th, 2009
10:00 pm - The Nero Wolfe Cookbook, Rex Stout and Others
This strikes me more as the thing you give to someone who's into Nero Wolfe books than an actual cookbook. Part of that is that the recipes have so many ingredients that are tough to find (squab, pheasant) or prohibitively expensive (caviar, truffles). Then there's the fact that the recipes are kind of hard to follow. It'll just say to cook something, with no mention of how long or at what temperature.
It doesn't help that a lot of the ingredients are either not to my taste or things I actively find gross.
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09:56 pm - Capyboppy, Bill Peet
The author tells of a capybara that came to live with his family and scare the cats. The illustrations are adorable.
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